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I spotted her there in her beach chair, the ocean wide with families interacting, laughter and joy surrounding. Little boy sitting at her side, chattering, nudging, vying for attention.
She remained out of touch, face buried in the phone.
The sickness prevails across the land – the sickness of disconnection.
“She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise.” Proverbs 31:27-28
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I see it in shopping centers, restaurants, and parks; in homes, cars, and doctor’s offices.
When I die, I don’t want to be remembered as the mom/Gigi who cherished her phone.
I want to be present. I want to interact, communicate, engage.
Not electronically, although I often do, and there are a time and a place.
But we must – we are obliged, oh may we be compelled
to be present for our kids.
Mom, this summer, will you accept this challenge with me? While those kids are home from school, as you set up that water sprinkler, spend time at the pool, and vacation – would you vow to disconnect and just be present?
Hang with me for a second here – I have a summer iPhone challenge for you in a sec!
How to disconnect and enjoy your kids this summer Click To Tweet
Take one picture and put down the phone. You can post it on Facebook and Instagram later – after the kids are in bed. It doesn’t have to be done ASAP! No one – and I mean NO. ONE. is waiting with bated breath in the social media world to view a picture of your kids at Disney World.
You do not work for Twitter. You {probably} don’t draw a paycheck. Your family will not go hungry because you didn’t tweet every five minutes today.
Your job is here, right now
1. Keep an eye on everyone.
2. Keep them busy and productive.
3. Build their respect for you.
4. Anticipate their praise, and that of your husband.
Why? Because you posted 20 pictures on social media and engaged with half your “friends” via likes, comments, and personal messages?
Nope.
Because you put that phone aside, walked away from it, and
did your job.
Disconnect this summer
Let’s emerge from the imaginary world this summer, mom. Before the iPhone, before the techno world, before blogging and Etsy shops, mothering was happening. I raised my kids in the ’90s, without a phone attached to my hip – I had a Velcro child instead.
I know what you’re thinking. “That was you, we live in a new age now, get with it.”
I have an iPhone. I get incredibly sucked in, as Satan (probably gleefully) watches me disconnect and live a shadowy, shallow life, and that is why I’m asking – no, I’m begging you to join me in this venture.
What will it look like? I’m not going to list tips such as three basic steps to disconnect from the internet, or the trick to only engage on social media twice a day. It looks different for each person. All I’m saying is:
Put down the phone and walk away.
Enjoy the kids this sunny season. Enjoy your husband. Engage in family time, neighborhood deck parties, and yard sales.
Don’t be that mom on the beach, out to lunch with all her Facebook “friends” while her little boy grows up accepting the belief that his position as second in line is the norm.
Just be the mom.
A Simple Summer iPhone Challenge
Disconnect with the Summer iPhone Challenge!
Let’s do a summer iPhone challenge! Here’s how:
1.) Get a small box or pretty basket.
2.) Pick a time every day to leave your phone in the box. Can you do it for one hour? Two? Three?? {Gasp}
3.) Follow me on Instagram
4.) Post a picture of your box
5.) Use the hashtag #summeriphonechallenge and #summerofsurrender
6.) Tag me@ruthiegray.mom
We’ll do it together – bonus points if you get your family to join!
Let’s do this. #summeriphonechallenge
“She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise.” Proverbs 31:27-28, MSG
Well said Ruthie! I was out to lunch today with some friends and I looked around the restaurant and many were on their phones. Not engaging with the people they were with. You are right, we all can get sucked into it easily, but remember those days when all we had to do was call a friend on the phone to have a conversation. An actual conversation. I for one, could squeeze you for this post!
Hey friend … This looks like a really, really good post. But I am on a Mac and I can only see about 80% of it. The left margin is running into the side border? I'm pretty sure there's some stellar stuff in here. Anything you can do about the visibility issue?
It really is a sickness – a monster we have created. We've forgotten how to communicate in the midst of the quest for communication! Thanks for the thumbs up, friend!
Yeah – throw out your Mac! Lol sorry about that – gonna make a change as soon as I can. Enjoy Texas and the fam!
You are hitting the nail on the head, Ruthie! I've seen so many parents out with their kids and glued to their phones. I don't have an iphone. Mine's a dumbphone, but I'm home most days with my laptop available. I had been thinking over the last few days, that I want to be wiser about social media. Limit the amount of time I spend. That's hard for a blogger! 🙂 But I want more productive time to write, to enjoy my family and enjoy my life.
I'm playing around with scheduling this week. Yours is the second blog I read this morning, and it's TIME TO SHUT MY LAPTOP and go have breakfast with my girl! 🙂
Yes, Betsy, it is extremely hard as a blogger to find balance! But we must strive for that, and good for you shutting down for your girl! I e pulled away quite a bit this week and it has been great! Thanks as always for your support!
Much-needed wisdom for today's parents, Ruthie. One of my favorite quotes is from Jim Elliot: "Wherever you are, be all there! Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God." I'm glad you linked this up with us at Grace & Truth!
Yes I love that Jim Elliot quote as well, Jennifer. It can apply to many things. Always a pleasure to be a part of Grace and Truth!
What an inspiring post. I'm definitely trying to put down my phone more. Thanks for linking up with Tuesday Talk!
Thanks, Becky! After I wrote this my daughter decided to be more intentions with her phone time also around her son. I'm glad God could use these words!
Read this again, friend. Yes, you nailed it. I’ve been convicted in this area. We do get sucked in. I’m realizing I can be so much more productive if I look at Facebook/IG, say 2 or 3 times a day for a few minutes and engage with a few people, look at notifications, etc, than if I’m checking my notifications every 15 minutes! Yikes! This is a brilliant challenge.
I think we all need a redo about halfway through the year, friend. I know I certainly do! Time to RESET!! Thanks for your support – always love seeing you in my neck of the woods! 🙂
I’m excited about this challenge Ruthie. I am spending today doing one hour on, one hour off. So far, I’ve done one round. I have the perfect place for my phone in the one hour off periods. Gonna get my husband to join in as soon as he get home, and we can channel some good time frames for the school year. I’m thinking of starting with the hour after whatever time I pick them up from school and then another from maybe 7-8 or 7:30-8:30. Just brainstorming. #babysteps I was so convicted yesterday when I read a devotion that reminded me of the verse, “as a man thinketh, so is he.” All I thought was, I am my phone and my IG. I have got to do better.
Brittany! You are such a breath of fresh air. I love how you soak up wisdom and then you DO something about it! Yay! Do you mind if I share this testimony on IG sometimes soon? I love how you broke it down into practical, actionable steps! We cannot let our phones rule our lives – we’re rearing our kids (and grandkids) to think this is noraml! <3