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I have a confession to make. I stink at compassion. I’m a wife of nearly 29 years, mom of 4, Gigi to 1-1/2, and I just want everyone to suck it up.
Today is the day. The one we’ve been dreading for months.
My husband is undergoing surgery at Duke to remove babies 59 and 60 two massive kidney stones.
We’ve been doing this a long time. Technically, I’m a wimp for birthing only four kids.
The man has been producing his “babies” for 30 years.
This is his third surgery of its kind.
Who wants to give me a medal?
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I really do feel badly for him. Post-surgery is really when it all hits the fan.
Ever had a stint? Not. Fun. I’ll spare you the gory details, just suffice it to say, we will not be having a post-surgery party.
Recovery means passing tiny, busted up particles, enduring general discomfort for him, and practicing compassion for me.
Have I ever mentioned I don’t do compassion?
I'm the mom nobody wants when they're sick. I don't do compassion. Share on X
Ask my kids
“Mom, my leg hurts!”
“It’s just growing pains. Here’s a tylenol.”
“Mom, I just cut my finger!”
{Slap cold rag and pressure on said finger while covering eyes and looking the other way.}
***Have I mentioned I don’t do blood? You really don’t want me passing out.
“Mom, I think I’m gonna throw up!”
“Here’s the yucket bucket and a bell. Ring it and I’ll send your sister.”
Remember my 31 Hats Mom Wears series?
Day 1: The Nurse’s Cap. The struggle is real, my friends. But, I’m working on it. Actually, God is working on me – that’s probably why I keep ending up at hospitals with my husband.
Compassion
Do you have it?
I’m trying to reach way down inside to find it. Scrounging around to see if there is even an inkling left.
It’s not so much that I don’t have compassion for others – I empathize well with moms of littles, middles, teenagers, , young adults, and empty-nesters.
It’s just that I don’t do so well with my people.
God has brought me a long, long way on this. Growing up an only child with introverted tendencies didn’t do me any favors in the whole reaching-out-to-others-sharing-myself thing.
Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand – shine!
Keep open house; be generous with your lives.
By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in
heaven. ~Matthew 5:16
BAM!!
POW!!
ZOWEE!!
(Anyone remember the original Batman series? If not – Youtube. Younger generation – you are missing out on sleek culture here. My nineteen-year-old didn’t even know there was a Flying Nun. Something is wrong with the world.)
Anyhoo.
Compassion does not come easy for some of us. (Although knowledge of pop culture is sick which means cool, therefore second nature and a necessity.)
When you read The Nurse’s Cap, you will realize that I have, in fact, come a long way, baby. (I kind of grew numb after baby kidney stone #35.)
But that wasn’t me.
It was ALLLLLLLLL God.
Did you know God can work in you so hard that you don’t even recognize yourself? People be like, “Where is that person that ______________(insert weakness such as: flies off the handle, spends money like water, or ahem, practices compassion like she’s Florence Nightingale).
Did you know that God can work in you so hard that you won't even recognize yourself? Share on X
It’s God.
When you lay down your will, walk with God, read His Word, memorize it (that is SO key) and pray, you arm yourself with unconquerable weapons!
Mom, you have the power of the Almighty on your side.
If God be for us, who can be against us?
Can I get an amen in up in the house???
Today is your day, sis. Start now.
Baby steps. Wherever you are, start there. God will meet you. And He’ll grow you, and stretch you, and be right there with you.
Meanwhile – I’ll let you know if it’s a boy or a girl.
PS Please tell me I’m not alone here. Do you have trouble with compassion too? Let me know in the comments how you deal with that!
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I didn’t want to laugh at this, but I did! Compassion, only a God thing. Truly. I only have compassion for one person, my daughter Katie. She has had my compassion since the day she came out of my womb, everybody else, I say, “Suck it up.” I don’t think a lack of it is all that bad, I mean, think about it, aren’t we suppose to “toughen them up.” Especially girls, do we want to make drama queens out of them? Our Hannah, oh drama queen ain’t the word for it. So what does this lack of compassion grammie say, ” Hannah, give it to God.” Yup, that’s my compassion for you. Her response, “okay Grammie, Give to God.”
I can see why you would have compassion for Katie. But you have done such a good job with her! “Okay Grammie, give to God” – love it! I should start that with Sawyer. Talk about drama…
I feel your pain. When God was giving out mercy, I was in the wrong line. BUT, I’m learning and God is teaching me. I am one of those in whom God has done so much work that I hardly recognize myself. It’s a bit like a total makeover and boy, did I need it. I stopped by from CBB. Have a great week.
Hi Leah! I recognized you. Our paths have crossed in GG also. Looking forward to getting to know you better! Aren’t you glad God doesn’t give up on us? (I’m also glad you could relate to my “lack”)!
You have sucesfully made me laugh this evening. :)
I tend to be very compassionate and my hubby not so that makes for some interesting relationship fodder. :)
Thank the Lord for patience and compassion with us and becoming a new creation in Him!
Haha happy to oblige, Lillian! I do hope you are doing well with your new blog! Your tenacity will pay off, I promise!
Yes – interesting relationship fodder indeed. It seems to be the norm that compassionate and non-compassionate people marry, doesn’t it?!
So true – Christ is so very compassionate with us! How can we not reciprocate?
You made me giggle & encouraged my heart! Thank you for honestly writing on a topic about which too many of us are afraid to admit we stink! I connect with this – the introverted struggle to reach out, the fear of gross things like blood, and a general stinky attitude about stepping out of my comfort zone when someone needs compassion. It is all baby steps. And leaning heavily into Jesus. :)
Alison, I think you and I have way more in common than either of us realize! I love your article on Introversion and how you speak freely about it – I do as well. And now, the stinky, less than compassionate attitude. Yes, baby steps!
But best of all – we have a FRIEND connection! Grace Lawson! I’ve known her for years and years – in fact, I even taught her piano lessons when she was young! How small is this world, really?!?